Temper ~ Paradox in the COVID Era

TY Chuck Annable for the photo

I love paradoxes and oxymorons; they get us to extend our comfort zone. So, I started thinking about the word “temper.”*  [Aside ~ my mom felt English was the inanest language on earth - the same sounding word was spelled and meant too many different things (write, right, rite, etc.).  In all fairness, English was her 7th language].

Temper has several noun and verb meanings that are contradictory.

Since COVID-19 started, we’re juggling many different jobs, tasks, emotions, needs, skills, ideas, plans, people, and circumstances simultaneously. The paradox of Temper is obvious.  We’re trying to balance being calm, consistent, resilient at work for those we lead and manage and/or at home while inside we may be angry, frustrated, and exhausted.  We are the counterbalance to the angst and fear our employees and peers feel.  As leaders, we’re constantly tuning the pulse of the organization to keep it going, growing, hopefully thriving.  We have to be as strong as steel and vulnerable (elastic?) enough so others feel safe and free to come to us. 

Mackerel Sky ~ Pemaquid, ME

Everything seems to be a paradox today.  Life has always been paradoxical, it’s just more ‘in your face’ today than  before COVID-19. In pre-COVID-19 days, embracing paradox was not as painful (usually).  During COVID-19, it’s darn hard.  My hope for you is that, in one of the rare calmer moments, any learning from and during this time can take root, so when you come out on the other side, you can use that new wisdom and insight for good - for your family, your team, your company, yourself.

Wear your mask, keep your distance, be safe.

*Many thanks & love to Ryan Brown, one of my bluest blue lobsters, for our discussion about ‘temper’ & for the lasting legacy of his work & passion that is still positively changing Brown University’s School of Engineering!!!

#Whatif We Valued Trying?

We humans love to divide the world: yes, no; either, or; black, white; true, false; winners, losers; successes,Arianna Huffington, Co-Founder Huffington Post (designed by behappy.me) failures.  Yet little in life is really that nice and tidy, despite how much we want it to be.  And our world is not going in that direction anymore.

Many of us know that new discoveries, the disruptions, the innovations are found in the grey – in between the extremes, by recombining what is out there through And and Both instead of Either and Or.  As someone with a head of black, white and grey hairs, believe me, I live it!

Perhaps one of the most dangerous of these artificial constructs is that of successes or failures.  This has insidiously permeated so many of our systems – especially the language of entrepreneurship and innovation.  We don’t allow a middle or blended path.  When we look at the successful entrepreneurs, how many of them were successful the very first time? How many had overnight successes that truly were overnight, instead of years? Very few. 

What if we start talking about Tryers (which obviously means people will go to the opposite extreme of Non-Tryers) instead of just winners or successes?

What if we started encouraging and supporting those who try, over and over, be it the same or a different venture. 

What if we helped the Non-Tryers to understand why they didn’t try? Perhaps it is fear, time, who knows… but perhaps we could develop a support structure to allow them to become Tryers, in their own time?

What if we started to infiltrate our education system with tools, lessons, examples, opportunities to Try so that our children could become Tryers at earlier and earlier ages.  And What If we rewarded them for it? And What if we rewarded our teachers for teaching smart Trying?

While a full societal adoption of the Trying construct certainly will take time, you can start now! There are many ways you can start embedding Tryers into your organization’s lexicon.  So What If you, tomorrow, asked one of your people to Try and What if you back her or him up when she/he raises objections for why something couldn’t be done?  What if you just started with that?

Thank you to @mattmurrie for helping me more fully embed “What If” in my lexicon.

It's Obvious

Another fabulous post by my friend Jessica Esch.  Her sketches are addicting, which is a very good thing.  Her recent post was the number 1 hit on my site in March and her previous post was another top hit, of course. Thank you Jessica for letting me share your wisdom and talent!